Remember your first pregnancy? All those people telling you to take it easy? Never being able to lift anything bigger than a kettle without somebody jumping in? Being able to nap at any given moment and sleeping through the night? If only it was the same the second time around.
The Difference in Sickness
This time I have been very sick compared to my pregnancy with Jake. I don’t think I would have even been making it to work if I still had a full-time job. But this time it’s a different scenario at home, I already have one child to look after. I’ve had to get up when he has and make his breakfast… usually after I’ve retched a few times into the sink. I’ve had to get us both dressed and out the door to get to pre-school and I’ve had to carry on normal duties to the best of my ability.
The guilt I felt during those sick weeks was overwhelming. I am lucky to have an understanding child but sitting him in front of the telly for most of the time or asking him not to bother me whilst I laid down had me feeling incredibly bad for him. I knew it wasn’t going to last forever which is what I had to keep telling myself and I was so grateful that he did have pre-school to fulfil his needs for 15 hours a week.
People are definitely much more excited for you the first time around too and even though that’s ok by me because the attention got a bit much when I was pregnant before, it does feel a bit like you are expected to be fine and to just get on because your body has already done this once. No one questions when I start running around after Jake, or when I pick him up, or when I say I mowed the lawn, did the big shop, walked the dog and so on. These now go overlooked. Even the midwife sees you less this time too.
No Time to Recuperate
It is also a totally different experience because any time to rest goes out the window. Jake has woken quite a lot recently which is having a knock on effect on my mood and energy levels in the day. He doesn’t nap in the day so I have had to just get on and try my best to keep up (without caffeine!) whilst wishing for bedtime to come quickly around. Now that the summer holidays have hit I have really felt the impact. Jake is probably one of the most energetic children I have ever met. Each day I am greeted with ‘morning, get breakfast, where are we going today?’ He can and he will do so much and being stuck at home with me is not his idea of fun anymore. Pre-school is being missed by both of us because they meet his needs. I have tried to do activities every day including soft play, a trip to the farm, going into town and doing arts and crafts at home but it has all caught up with me today and I felt broken when I woke. Luckily, I have Grandparents on standby to help and I was very happy to be able to crawl back under the duvet once Jake went off this morning. Just that time away to chill, to catch up on my rest and to have some silence has helped to re-charge my batteries ready for the weekend. I must admit that the start of the new term can’t come too soon. Not because I want to be away from him but because this pregnancy is taking it out of me.
Stranger Food Issues
The food issue has probably been a contributing factor towards my lack of energy levels. In my first pregnancy I felt sick but was never physically sick. Most foods were still ok and I could even manage a cup of tea- mostly decaf but when I needed it I could reach for the PG Tips! This time I have gone through bigger food aversions and now at 17 weeks I am completely off all potato and products made from them, tea, red meat which means no chilli con carne or spaghetti bolognese and some days my evening meal has been just toast because I just don’t fancy anything else.
The foods that I have loved have been curries, peaches, anything with chicken and hot lemon in place of tea. I’ve also found that I need to eat more consistently this time to keep my body going. I was working when pregnant with Jake so could only eat at the set times at work. Perhaps work was a distraction?
If you follow me on Instagram you will know that I enjoy working out which is something I didn’t do when expecting Jake. I have been training in HIIT classes using weights, barbells, Hungarian bags, battle ropes etc for over a year now so it is perfectly safe for me to continue to do so in this pregnancy whilst under the watch of my instructor. Unfortunately, the sickness and tiredness meant that I had to take 4 weeks off but I made it back last week and felt so much better for doing so. I have only managed one class a week but I am hoping this will increase once the pregnancy progresses. I am aiming to be much fitter and stronger this time around.
I long for the days when I can eat properly again and know exactly what I want for dinner… hubby too! The number of times he has to ask what I want and the only response he gets is a shrug! I am also hoping for a surge in energy at some point in this trimester, if not my last one.
If you are pregnant for the very first time and you are getting fed up of people fussing, telling you to take it easy, to eat well and wanting to do things for you, lap it up! You won’t have this forever and as soon as a baby comes you will be very grateful for the help.
If you are pregnant for the second, third, fourth time how are you finding it? Is it easier for you or harder? Do you have ways of keeping on top of your energy or for getting a good night’s sleep?